Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Giving Your Best In Marriage

B - Bless
E - Edify
S - Share
T - Touch

I saw the above acronym for BEST and I thought: how pertinent to marriage.

In the early days of friendship/courtship, we do each of these four things easily. But as our relationship ages and we get absorbed by the demands on us from work/ministry/family members etc, we begin to stop doing these things. So, unknowingly, we stop giving our best to our marriage and we wonder why we do not like/love each other as before.

When a business is not doing well, we take time to review our processes, markets and strategies to identify and eliminate unhelpful practices. Let's do the same for our marriage now.

Ask yourself how often or when you last blessed your spouse - wished them well, prayed for them, praised them to their face and before others, helped them to feel valued?

Ask yourself whether you edify ie build up your spouse. Do you encourage them in your words and actions? Do you help them become better? I don't mean nagging them to change to your preference. I mean helping them become all God wants them to be, what He has skilled them to be, helping them actualise their potential. A confident and fulfilled spouse is more able to love in return.

Ask yourself how much sharing you do. Do you share each other's thoughts, concerns and joys? Do you open up to them? Do you listen to them and encourage them to open up to you? Do you share physical things too? Sharing enables trust which is critical to a marriage.

Ask yourself how often you touch your spouse - not just the touchings that prelude physical intimacy. Touching just to connect and communicate your affection and approval. Touching to maintain the bond and link of friendship and say silently 'you are special'. Touching creates a bond - watch mothers and their babies/children.

Give your BEST to your marriage today.

Pat Idaewor

About the Author
Dr Pat Idaewor has been married for over 21years with four children (ages:10-20). She has been a believer since 1983. Part of a ministry is engaged in inner city Christian work. She is a strong believer in the power of God's word to change and prosper people. She can be reached at patidaewor@yahoo.co.uk

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