Friday, May 31, 2013

You're my Everything And Everything is You

I remember a time that I found myself in a really bad relationship and every time I thought of walking away I would ask myself "But what will my weekends be like? Where would I go when I wanted to go out? The pool reminded me of him, the cinemas reminded me of him even the car park in front of my faculty reminded me of him! "I'm trapped!" I thought "He is everywhere! I better stay put."

It seemed like I couldn't remember what it was like to spend weekends alone or with my other friends and family. I didn't even want to tell people that our match-made-in-heaven-celebrity-romance had ended.

So many people caught in the web of addictive relationships. And often, we realise that we have been in relationships that have disappointed us in some way or another... relationships that didn't work out the way we had hoped, wanted or thought they would. And, we're not just talking about intimate and love relationships. We're talking about toxic friends, back stabbing relatives, abusive partners and controlling family members, vicious colleagues.

Sometimes the poisoned relationship is with a family member or a childhood friend. Or perhaps a friendship has lived out its purpose. In this case, so much time has been invested in the friendship that it is hard to let go. However, addictive relationships are most often evident in romantic interactions between men and women.

A person who is excessively attached to another person most likely carried those habits over from past relationships. The conditions in past relationships can leave a person feeling inadequate and empty. Romantic relationships are not the only type that causes such habits to develop; they can also stem from lack of nurturing or attention during childhood, isolation or detachment from family, early abandonment, unrecognised early needs and fears of rejection. Often, children who are not loved, nurtured and encouraged in their independence are left feeling 'needy' as adults and may thus be more vulnerable to dependent relationships. These 'clingy' feelings which develop early in childhood, often operate without awareness and can exert considerable influence on a person's life. Often, dysfunctional relationship patterns are passed on from parents to their children

But the truth is when Jesus becomes everything, He will be enough. Someone I have had the privilege of being a part of my history, planted this seed in my heart at a time in my life when I did not know what the HECK she was talking about.

But now it is clearer to me and so much more important to me what she meant. There simply isn’t anyone like Jesus. Sometimes I have a word “jam” in my mind when I want to try to describe Him. He defies understanding. The closer you get to Him the quicker you realise that the human expression is sadly lacking in its ability to interpret Him. It is at this point that it becomes clear exactly who God is and who is a being that dwells inside of a speck of dust.

A time MUST come for ALL of us where Jesus becomes everything we could ever need. It is my prayer that today is that day. You will find that He is indeed enough. So it is and shall be in Jesus’ Name amen.

Ijeoma Olujekun

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