Monday, February 17, 2014

When a partner backslides...

It was some days after the national youth service corp passing out ceremony.  He had known Biola long enough. He was really excited and deep within himself he felt the time had come. He called all of their friends to tell them about his surprise proposal to his girlfriend of five years.  He invited her out on what ought to be a normal date night at one of their regular spots. The band rendered a special number he had earlier requested for. Their friends took cover under the dim light of the restaurant. He went over his lines over and over again in his mind. There couldn't have been a better time. It's going to be a night like no other.

She was used to being spoilt by him; their date nights were always unforgettable.  He knew just how to make ordinary moments special. He sometimes seemed to her like a dream. Everyone in their circle loved their relationship and her friends couldn't stop gushing about how lucky she was. She couldn't stop the tears of joy that snaked down her eyes when at the end of the special number he got down on one knee and recited some lines of poetry before asking her to marry him.

She'd always known the day would come but never suspected it's going to be that night. She screamed yes and they were both locked in an embrace that was so tight they looked like one forgetting they had company. The applause and shouts of congratulations brought them back to life.
The moment gave life to perfect but like everything, perfect is only a dream.
Theirs was a model Christian relationship, they grew up together helping each other's faith.

She got a scholarship to study abroad and he got a job with one of the multinational companies.
Life outside school was a lot different, he had a good job and also discovered he could get anything he wanted, beautiful women inclusive. He's no longer whom she used to know. He demanded to have sex with her saying they were going to get married anyway. She's conflicted and wants to know what to do.

N.B: All relationships aren't the same but some things are constant. When one partner backslides, first thing to do is pray and ask for God's guidance. Commit your relationship into God's hands and ask for wisdom in approaching the matter.
Talk to your partner about the change you have noticed trying very much not to be judgmental. Look out for a deep sense of remorse and a change in attitude. Be willing to forgive.
However if he is unwilling to change, you need to move on with your life and pray for a better partner. Your relationship with God is also very important and you need to avoid anything that'll compromise it. Staying in an unhealthy relationship is never the way out of things.

If you have any suggestions on what she needs to do, please use the comment box.

God bless. 

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