Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Five Things You Shouldn't Do On A First Date

Dating is an important phase for many of us. Before you commit to be someone's partner for life, you want to know what the person is like, his or her peeves, and generally to check if there is a connection between both of you. Well, before you get to the part where you learn all about the other person, there's a dreadful first date you have to get through. I call it dreadful because for most of us, it is the make or break date.  It is the date where you decide you want to see that person again or run as fast as you can in the opposite direction. Unfortunately,  some of us get the first date downright wrong and remain in the search phase for longer than we'd like.  Below are some things you should NOT do  on the first date.

Don't Dress Shabbily: I don't know if I'm the only one that gets ticked off if a person dresses scruffy to a date. I think it's downright rude to invite or be invited to a date, and then show up in a ruffled shirt or clothes that look like pyjamas. Put a little effort into your appearance! I know people say "beauty comes from within" but trust me, what you look like on the outside is very important too. Put on some perfume, use an antiperspirant if you must- sweat maps on your shirt are not exactly a fun sight to behold. Ladies, relax on the makeup; your eyebrows don't need to look like overfed earth worms chasing each other. Keep it simple but be elegant. 

Don't Bring Your Friends Along:  First dates are usually about two people that want to get to know each other better. Any other person is an intrusion that should not be encouraged.  The third party habit is very popular amongst young ladies;  excuses like "I'm nervous about sitting with him alone" or ludicrous statements like " I'm sure he has enough money to buy us all lunch" are common with women. Come on ladies!!! If a guy invites you to a date,  don't see it as an opportunity to eat till you burst and feed all your friends. Go alone,  enjoy the date and decide if you'd like to see him or her again without any external factors  influencing you.

Don't Go On About Your Ex: We all have baggage, dirty laundry and all sorts of unattractive factors that we should keep under wraps. One baggage most of us share in common is the ex that hurt us to the depth of our souls. Well, as sad as it may seem, it is unacceptable to go on and on about how much you've been hurt in the past, on a first date.  It creates an impression that you are not ready to move on or would like to be dated out of pity.  It also places a lot of expectations before the new guy or girl, and to be honest, no one wants to be greeted with a train load of responsibility and expectations on the first date.  If you can't go thirty minutes without mentioning your ex, perhaps you should suspend dating for a while.

Don't Just Sit There and Stare:  This is one thing I don't understand- a person invites me to a date but has nothing to say to me or ckaims he's too shy to speak to me. Huh?! Are we going to stare at each other all day??? I've experienced this first date faux pas so many times, I even gave up on going on dates. I was tired of going on like a radio and whenever I kept quiet, it was a very awkward silence.  How do you expect someone to go on a second date with you when the only words you uttered at the first date were "Hello. how are you?"

Don't Talk About Sex:  I don't know where some people get the  idea that everyone wants to jump into bed and have sex after exchanging pleasantries but believe me, talking about sex on the first date, second and  third dates even is a no no! Maybe it will be fun with a potential one night stand but with a decent lady or man that you'd like to have a meaningful relationship with, it is a no no! There are so many topics  on earth that can be discussed on a first date,  sex shouldn't be on the list.

Are there any DONT'S that tick you off? Do share! 

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