Monday, September 1, 2014

What Do Real Men Have to Offer?

I am tired, exhausted and completely exasperated by the amount of unsolicited advice constantly doled out to women. "A real woman supports her man's dreams", "a real woman stands by her man no matter what", "a real woman doesn't strive to win arguments with her husband", "a real women keeps herself in shape for her man, manages her man's finances, helps her man achieve his goals....the list goes on. I have to ask "what do real men do while real women are busy running helter-skelter to make sure their men are not bothered by the sound of a mosquito. Why is there so much advice out there for women, yet no one focuses on men? Why are women expected to constantly bear the burden of the relationship? What do real men have to offer? or rather, what should real men aim to offer?

I find it interesting that there are more absent fathers in the world than there are absent mothers, yet women are being told they are doing something wrong. Women are constantly being advised to support the dreams and aspirations of their spouses, yet no one encourages women to follow their dreams. It's time for men to step up to the plate, and meet women halfway in this 'real women-real men' relationship business.

Real men should support the dreams of their wives! Women are always expected to give up everything once they find a suitable partner. Never mind any dreams and aspirations she may have, many men now believe if she is not home by the time they arrive at home, she is not worth the trouble. She is not supporting them, therfore she has to go. HUH?! She had dreams before she met you, and as a real man, your mission is to help her achieve those dreams just like she helps you achieve yours. I have read about men who prevent their wives from obtaining a masters degree or accepting a fancy job because she won't be home early enough to cook dinner. Real men don't crush their wives' dreams, they build them!

Real men don't cheat! That may sound cliche but it's definitely because it's true. Real men don't cheat on their wives simply because the maid looks tempting or cooks the meals. It is a 19th century ideology that women must be home to cook everyday of the week. Thank God for refrigerators and microwaves, women can cook all they want on weekends and leave the rest to the freezer and microwave. Unreal men believe this is an abomination because just getting their food from the freezer to the microwave is unheard of! Real men appreciate the efforts made to prepare and preserve the food and will help their wives in any way they can. They don't sleep with the maid because she cooks! I call it the 19th century poverty mentality fueled by a man's indiscipline, and used as a flimsy excuse to get away with unbecoming behaviour. A man should be grateful his wife works just as hard as he does to provide for the family! It shows her ability as a partner and not her desire to be a liability! If you are going to cheat because she doesn't cook everyday, or because the chef cooks your meals, check your real-o-meter, you may be running low.

A real man is a leader! Real leaders are not people with fragile egos and low self-esteem who are constantly looking for assurance of their masculinity. Real men don't lead by bullying or maltreatment of their wives. Real men respect their wives, because that's what leaders do. Real men guide their wives appropriately because that's what leaders do! Real men are the spiritual leaders of the home, not the dead weight their wives have to carry. Real men have a duty to provide and protect, not to suck dry and then throw to the dogs. Real men stand by their wives, they pray for their wives, they shower their wives with love and give her the necessary attention. They don't walk around acting like lords of the jungle or expecting their wives to jump whenever they snap their fingers. They understand a relationship is a partnership, with two people contributing all they can to its success.

Are you a real man?

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