Monday, April 28, 2014

Why is it so hard to stay faithful

I'm beginning to think fidelity is obsolete. There's a new trend in town- to completely ignore the exclusivity of relationships as well as the sanctity of marriage; to simply have fun with whoever, whenever and act like everything is about us.

I am not referring to men only; women are also very guilty of infidelity.  Many women date men they are not really into; I have heard the most ridiculous classifications these men fall into- minister of transport, minister of finance, minister of home affairs.... you get the point. And of course,  most men these days are not strangers to infidelity. Married men, men in courting, 'single' men, it doesn't matter what category they fall into, infidelity seems to be the trend in vogue. I sometimes imagine these men sitting around a table at a pub and discussing how many concubines they have and why they have them...

Why is it so hard to be faithful?

I wish someone could give me an answer to that one. Is it because many women now offer themselves shamelessly for a ten minute thrill? Is it because many men these days are trapped in a playstation mentality? When you get bored with the game, you can stop,  switch teams and start afresh? Or should I call it the 'men's world' mentality, where many men still believe some things are perfectly ok if men do them, no matter how appalling these things are?

Personally I think the root reason people cheat is greed! Greed by definition is an intense and selfish desire to have more of something. For some women that cheat, it's the greed for money that drives them. Sadly this greed for money is usually to acquire silly things like phones,  shoes, clothes etc. While many men cheat because they just want more sex, or should I say a different taste of sex.

My advice to people is to stay faithful or stay single! Stop insulting your partner's trust and intelligence by claiming you love him or her while you fuel your selfish desires by chasing someone else. it is sickening,  disgusting and even dangerous to you! So many lives have been destroyed as a result of one person's infidelity,  so many people are living on ARVs, wishing they could turn back the hands of time and undo some of their actions and many people are in dissatisfying 'relationships' with people they intended to 'just have a fling with'.

It doesn't cost you anything to be faithful.  If infidelity is an urge you just can't control, then pray about it. Believe me, it is not a trivial prayer for God to answer. When you approach a person or you're approached by someone,  your decision to date that person should be based on the fact that you believe everything you need is in that person. If he or she doesn't have what you need, don't approach for the fun of an ego boost, and don't accept simply because you don't want to hurt his feelings. Rather be straightforward than an infidel! I count cheating as an act of cowardice, expressed by people that are still trapped in an infant's mentality. Infants see a box of chocolates and want all the chocolates now! Adults know a box of chocolates can cause some uncomfortable bowel movements.  Which are you?  A greedy infant or an adult with self-control? 

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