Saturday, April 30, 2016

Five Signs You're an Insecure Man

Most of the time, when we talk about insecurities, we refer to women. However, the truth is that many men suffer from various insecurities, though they express them differently from women. There are many signs that indicate a man is insecure, and the list you are about to read is what I call the big five signs of male insecurity.

#1 You love to talk about what you have: If you are a man who feels the need to constantly tell others what you have, or blow your own trumpet regarding your achievements, you are seeking respect through your belongings because you don't believe they can like you without any of those attachments. That is a deep-seated insecurity that bases your self-worth solely on what you have and not who you are inside. Men with this type of insecurity usually come across as arrogant half-filled barrels. Men of this kind will go on for hours about what they've achieved unless their audience shuts them up!

#2 You can't stand rejection: There are men whose security in their masculinity is dependent on everyone saying yes to them all the time. If you are one of those men,you are no doubt insecure. You feel good only when a person gives in to your whims, and you hate it when a person stands their ground against your wishes. Men who can't stand rejection are men who usually plan out how things ought to work out with, and for other people. They decide without consulting those involved, and get frustrated when they realize those people have other plans.

#3 You frustrate your subordinates at work: There are many insecure males in top positions who derive joy only when their subordinates are running helter-skelter chasing nothing in particular. If you are a man who feels the need to constantly pressure his subordinates at work, or bring them to the point of tears, that's a sign you are insecure. A boss who makes his subordinates cry is an ineffective boss.

#4 You aim to control women: There are men whose source of masculinity is their control of women - even women they are not married to (not that marrying a woman justifies controlling her), but you get the gist. If you feel irritated by a woman who can hold her own, pursue her goals, and live life on her terms rather than yours, then you are the embodiment of insecurity. If you cannot stand a woman because she does not worship the ground you walk on or kiss your ass everytime you swing it in her face, you are insecure.

#5 You exploit the trust of others: The truth about insecure men is that they do not love themselves one bit,  hence it is difficult for them to love others. If you are the kind who likes to exploit others after they have shown they trust or love you,you are very insecure. If you are the type who deliberately seeks to harm others in a bid to test their love for you, insecurity is your middle name.

Sadly, society encourages men to be insecure because expressions of insecurity are masked as masculinity. As a man, learn to unlearn social and cultural philosophies that encourage your insecurity. XOXO

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