Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Love Insurance - Slovie Jungreis-Wolff

Three steps to protect the most important investment of your life.

You’ve seen the pictures and watched the news. Rivers overflowing, homes bashed down, basements flooded and a lifetime of memories washed away. People have inquired about natural disaster insurance and ‘what about next time?’

I started thinking about it. We work tirelessly building our homes. Marriages and relationships take great effort. We put in our best years. We sacrifice. We look away at slights. We open our hearts. We love more than we ever thought possible. There are times that we are fatigued but still, we keep at it.

And then one day there is a hurricane. Somehow a strange wind starts to blow. Doors slam. Painful words are exchanged. We don’t recognize the person sitting beside us. After the storm a painful silence overtakes us.

Can this home be saved?

Is there a way we can invest in love insurance before disaster strikes?

Love Insurance

1. Nurture Friendship with your Spouse

It is not enough to discuss the kids, the bills, and what to do about the leak in the basement. This will not make our love flourish. Marriage needs nurturing. We must keep the spark alive. We need to nourish the friendship that helps us grow to love and trust each other. We need to speak about our hopes and dreams, share our thoughts, laugh together, and sooth each other’s hurts. Not a day should go by that we do not give to our spouse as we would to a best friend; even giving a kind word or smile. We need to take the time out from our busy schedules to listen and be sure that we are not simply coexisting. And FYI, time carved out to communicate does not mean texting each other throughout the day.

2. Be Loyal

Too often we mock the weaknesses that we see in our loved one. We joke at their expense in public, sarcastically ridicule their mistakes, and knock them in front of the kids. When spouses put each other down, the respect and trust that we have slowly erodes. We don’t think about the effects of our rolling eyes and sharp little comments. But the sting remains, and the damage lasts longer than we could have imagined. We can accomplish so much more by recognizing positive traits than seeking out the negative.

3. Establish Meaningful Traditions

Time together anchors us. Whether it is Friday night dinners or treasured repeat vacation spots; these are the moments that connect us. Familiar rituals bond us and give us cherished memories. Taking time out to spend with your spouse relays the message that ‘you are important to me’ and ‘I love spending my life with you’. You are showing that you are committed to this relationship. For some husbands and wives, it is a weekly walk or bike ride. For others, it is a favorite ice cream jaunt where they can easily enjoy each other’s company. The most important point is that you find what works for you and never become too busy or preoccupied for the one you love.

We can make a difference and shield ourselves from hurt through the love that we create. This coming new year, commit to taking the time and energy to invest in love insurance.

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