Wednesday, January 22, 2014

O Woman! Curb thy tongue!!!

I was spending some time with a friend who seized the opportunity that I was free for lunch to moan and groan about his girlfriend and how he could not stand her tongue lashing. As much as I would have preferred to spend the afternnon talking about the weather or discussing short and long term goals, the discussion struck a chord in my heart.

I remembered the many times, when I was younger, that people told me I talk too much, and some even went as far as knowingly giving me gifts in the form of books such as "me and my big mouth" by Joyce Meyer and "The power of a woman's words" by Sharon Jaynes. Being the venomous talker that I was, I did not hesitate to tell them to get off my friendship wagon and combust if they could, I did not care...well, that was until i actually read those books and i started to pray for God to put a sieve between my brain and my mouth.

Women are known by most men for nagging! We can talk and talk until the statue of liberty angrily climbs off its pedestal to tell us to SHUSH!!! We complain, we nag, we murmur, we gossip, we judge every Sally, Jennifer and Kimberley but worst of all, we use our words to hurt. Some of us hurt our parents, we hurt our friends, we hurt our husbands, children, colleagues... and it seems there is no end in sight. Some of us like to call it brutal honesty... welcome to my under-21 club. Before you get too comfortable, may I ask who you are kidding?

It is very important for us women to curb our tongues!!! Very often, I see and hear women talking their husbands down like he's not the same man they walked down the aisle with, excitedly. More often than not, women use their tongues to chase their partners into the arms of another woman then they turn and scream about how horrible a man he was to have left. Imagine if you were in a relationship where your husband or even your boyfriend called you useless, ugly, idiotic and all kinds of demeaning words everyday, would you be eager to spend time with such a man?

It is time to use your tongue for what it is meant for- to speak life. if you don't have anything good to say, shut up! you won't burst into a million tiny pieces if you don't speak. If a colleague is ticking you off at the office, you don't need to reply every snide comment, calmly tell him or her to leave you be or better still, plug your earphones into your ears and hum to your favourite song. During the course of an argument with your partner, don't resort to digging up the history of how impoverished his family is or how you have made him something out of nothing. God did that, he only used you as a tool. Refrain from insulting words, even in the heat of an argument. If you feel all the words are about to force themselves out, walk away and take deep breaths. It doesn't only show-self control, it shows love and respect too!

Instead of using your tongue to lash out at those around you, begin to use it to confess life, confess beauty, pay compliments, pray for your partner, even when he's being annoying, don't hiss as he walks past, rather use that tongue to greet or keep quiet. I'm not asking you to adopt the silent treatment here but it's better to be quiet than to rant on and on about something trivial. Above all, pray to God for that sieve. It works for me. At least now I know which 'battle of the tongues' to pick and how to win them without dragging anyone through the gutter.

Remember that talking might be the gift God has given you. Use it to speak life to those around you!

Stay blessed ladies! xoxo

1 comment:

  1. I always pray for d grace to tame my tongue. James 1:26 has become my anchor scripture. Good post


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