Saturday, November 7, 2015

Getting Over The Anxieties Of Having Another Child

I come from a family of five kids and most times I wonder how my parents cope with us. Despite sharing same parents, we all have our distinct features and needs, especially emotionally. My parents stay in all our lives effortlessly and it wasn't until of late that I started really thinking about how superhuman that is.
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 Before I had my child there were many things that felt like unreachable goals. I never knew how to change a diaper. I don’t sleep much but I have always adored my ‘me’ time and the serenity of having my own space whenever I wanted. I knew my life was going to be altered but I never quite imagined the transition. There are times I just wanted to shout and scream but those beautiful pair of eyes staring directly into mine in the middle of scattered laundry, could  disarming. I have learnt to love far beyond whatever limits I might have had.There is absolutely nothing compared to the bod we share.

These past two years have happened so fast. I probably have done more growing up in these two years than I have most of my life. I get asked a lot when I’ll be ready for the second one, I laugh it off sometimes, other times, I say ‘soon’. What I am not saying however, is how scared I am that my heart might not be large enough to pour same amount of love on the second child. I also fear that my daughter might feel starved of affection seeing as she has always had me to herself. Asides, how am I going to handle two kids when how I have fared with one has been a miracle.  They say women are great jugglers, perhaps it wouldn’t be as hard as I suppose or it might come naturally. Maybe, my heart can stretch even further or I should not bother trying out for a second one? Inside me can be a bunch of varied disorganized thoughts sometimes. Perhaps, I should just take the leap and hope my heart can stretch. I have been made to understand that my fears are genuine and there are several women who feel the same way.  My mum’s ultimate tip is that every child brings a whole new kind of experience and that the heart is larger than we think. Apparently, we are oblivious of all the love we can give. There are however, steps one can take towards preparing for the second child and these tips are as shared by different mums.

 ·         Don’t give in to all of us your child’s requests, that way you would have taught him that he cannot always have his way and it wouldn’t seem so out of place when you do the same when the new child comes.

·         Having a couple of years between them can be an advantage. That way, one’s older child might be able to do somethings on his own .

·          “If the baby is fussing (not really crying, just complaining), make sure your first hears you say, ‘Just a minute baby, I'm helping (insert siblings name) right now.’ I did this several times the first few weeks, and when the tables were turned and I had to ask my firstborn to wait while I nursed, etc., it went much smoother.” -- Megan Rose Hershfield See more amazing tips HERE


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. Hmmm. I'm still wondering how i'll handle one child and all the questions they ask when they start speaking. Lol. But children are so adorable and they do bring a new perspective to life. More grease to your elbow!


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