Sunday, November 29, 2015

You knew what was in store for you before the marriage


In all marriages, you always get a glimpse of what the marriage will be like before you get married. The difference between successful marriages and unsuccessful marriages is that the successful ones see the issues and decide on whether they can or cannot live the issues. The unsuccessful ones see the issues and decide to go in thinking they can change their spouses (without prayer) whether the spouses like it or not.

Examples abound in the counselling cases that I encounter. There was one case where the woman said that the husband was constantly abusing her, verbally and physically. I then asked whether she did not notice this before marriage. She confessed that there were instances where there were flashes but he felt that it was just a phase and that the guy would get over this habit.

In another case, the guy was having emotional affairs with his ex-girlfriends. When I asked the wife about this behaviour before they got married, she said she noticed this trait. However she thought this would change after marriage. I asked if she confronted him about this issue. She said No. "Did you pray about it or did you pray to God about this issue?" I asked. She answered "No". Now she was complaining that the husband did not see anything keeping in touch with his ex-girlfriends.

I do believe that we have a God, a father who loves us unconditionally. If we are in any relationship, there is no reason why you should not take the relationship to God in prayer. Talk to God about the man or woman. Remember God is the author of marriage. If you truly believe in God's love, He will surely show you all things to come. And when He shows you things about the relationship, don't sweep it under the carpet. Listen to Him and do His will. He may tell you to leave the relationship. Don't continually think about the trappings of the relationship to the detriment of God's nudgings to you.

So if you are currently in a relationship and not yet married, ask yourself these questions about the relationship;

  • Do you have uneasy feelings about the relationship?
  • Have you talked to God about the uneasy feelings?
  • After praying about the feelings, have you talked to your fiance(e) about the issues? 

If there are still problems about the relationship, I beg you to reconsider.

A broken relationship is better than a failed marriage.

God Bless.


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