Friday, January 16, 2015

Getting Married: What's Age Got To Do With It?

I had an argument today with a friend, he was trying to justify the high divorce rates in the present times to the couple’s relative youthfulness and a woman’s reluctance to understand that men are natural cheats.

According to him, an older guy will be more discreet in his affairs compared to a younger one. He further stated that an older girl will be more matured in dealing with her husband’s infidelity (You know how I feel about this position and it has nothing to do with being a woman. You can read here). In short, he felt older couples handle situations better.

While I agree that maturity has a very important role to play in today’s successful marriages, I refuse to agree such maturity only comes with age. Being a young person doesn’t mean one is blinded or too incapacitated to make the right choices. I have been privileged to meet young purposeful men and also older guys that were just being pushed about by whatever life drops in their laps.

A child on the street can definitely tell more about the hard knocks of life compared to a man that grew up within a decent family. All I am trying to say is if you are being asked out by a 26 year old and a 34 year old guy and you are of a marriageable age, what you really need to look at is the way they handle things. Maturity only comes with experience and experience is not necessarily a factor of age.

What you are looking for is a man that can hold his own. He needs to have a stable source of income or other means through which you are sure you wouldn’t be caught up in a financial mess in the future. A man that runs to his mum every time there is an issue between you two is not who you are looking for.

Moreso, growing up with another counts for something. You are not just lovers, you are friends. Not every young man is clueless and not every old one is ready.

Age in this situation could really be just a number. I know you know better than pressuring a 21 year old boy or an 18 year old girl into marriage. I am writing this bearing in mind those in the mid 20s.

I would love to read your thoughts however, what do you think the right age should be for a guy and for a girl? Do you also think being young automatically translates to immaturity?



  1. If they both are ready to learn, kill ego, then younger couples have a great advantage. However, the older couples, as rightly mentioned have a more mature way of handling matters.

    Finally, the age isn't as per how long one has been on earth, but how knowledgeable one is on the matter.



  2. i have learnt that people's age, doesnt always sync with their level of maturity.

    If you like grt stories, check this blog out.


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