Friday, July 3, 2015

Forget Mixed Signal. Is He Yours Or Not?

I used to be so naïve about many things and too shy to ask questions on issues that could probably save my life. I was that kid that loved to be left alone. I naively thought I had a gentle character when I was very well sleeping on my rights half of the time. As time progressed, I discovered nobody is going to look out for me better than I look out for myself so I made conscious steps to speak up and whenever I am not clear about certain issues, I don’t hesitate to ask questions.

I have applied this philosophy of mine several times and it has helped me a lot.

There are times I get asked questions too and I try my best to answer to the best of my ability. 
An acquaintance asked me some time ago if I thought the guy she was involved with loves her. It sounded like a trick question to me at first ‘because I thought it was a no brainer.  Why should one think the person that one is exclusively in love with doesn’t share same feelings with one? But this things do happen. Perhaps it is one of those cases where one thing led to another and you are not really sure if both of you are a ‘thing’ or not. It could also be one of those cases where the person you are involved with is hot and cold.
Whatever the case may be, nothing compares to getting mixed signals and wanting to know where one stands. It is unfair for anyone to be putting in work on barren land.

The society demands for a lady to be graceful about things so a lady might feel reluctant to ask certain questions. Truthfully those sorts of questions never hurt anyone because for your sanity you need to know if he is in or not, so by all means ask. It is wrong to assume your position. People love free things and nobody would stop you from cleaning, cooking or giving whatever privilege you might be granting such person.
I was listening to the radio the other day when a woman called in. one could tell how unhappy she was by the tone of her voice. She said the man she has been living with for over twelve years and has three kids with, refused to marry her. The man said he wasn’t sure she is the one. Can you imagine that?

The signs are always visible, somehow we can tell when someone is not really into us but we selectively hold on to those memories when they acted like they were. There are million and one reasons why he probably hasn’t made up his mind on you. He could be treating you like the bird in hand while still hunting for the other birds in the bush. Whatever the case, If he is not sure what you are to him as to define it, then he is probably not ready so just let him go. He can come back when he is sure but don’t be caught in that web of ‘maybe’.

However, not everyone is a bad person, so he could be passing such signals because he is a very shy person. If this is your observation, then you can help him by making him define what he really feels for you and make it exclusive.

This might sound cliché but you truthfully deserve so much better. Love is not an emotion that can be tamed. If love is in your life (unless you are a special attention seeker) you don’t need to be told, you’l know.

Time is wealth, do not let anyone waste your precious time .



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