Saturday, March 28, 2015

How To Deal With Rejection

Have you ever mustered up the courage to finally ask that girl you have watched from afar out and she declined? Or were you that girl that did everything to get noticed by that guy you fancied so much but had to deal with the news that he was in a serious relationship? Can I have a show of hands if you were ever told you were not good enough for a job so you got turned down at the interview?

Did you play cool or you were really sad? Did you withdraw into yourself or you kept trying? How do you deal with getting rejected?

No matter how positive minded one is, rejection can be very devastating. How then should it be handled? Should you get mad at the other person for not recognizing you were the best choice they could have made? Should you severe all contacts with that girl because she didn’t say yes? Or should you understand that other people have a right to exercise their rights to choose and you probably don’t fit into what they desired?

By now we all agree not everyone we desire will find us equally desirable. Okay, that statement is overreaching, we all don’t agree that is why some of us find it so hard to deal with rejection. NO doesn’t have to be such a damning word, we should be civil enough to understand that other people have opinions too.

Good news is there are lessons to be learnt should from getting rejected. First thing you have to know is it is nothing personal. There are so many people that get rejected on a daily basis and the problem is not necessarily you. Everyone has different things they consider and different reasons for taking particular decisions which might not be about how you look, what you said or what you did. So, do away with whatever form of insecurity you might feel as a result of getting rejected. It is alright to feel bad but don’t dwell on it too much.

Don’t get bitter. You make choices every day so respect other people’s choices too. Other people’s choices might include turning you down which you probably also do too. So, don’t be bitter. Be civil about it. Nothing is worth staying mad at. Things might not play out as you wanted but with the right attitude you could gain a life long friendship in the one that turned you relationship request down.

Don’t be shamed into never trying new things again. The fact that Tola turned you down doesn’t mean ChiChi would do the same. Imagine if we all gave up after the first job interview. You need to keep trying. Rejection is not supposed to be a deadly blow, it is an opportunity to try other avenues.

Focus on the positive things. In a weird coincidence, I flipped through my Instagram in the course of writing this post and I saw a post of a young actress that was expressing her thoughts on getting rejected and how she deals with it. She said she stays close to those that bring her value. There so many other people that know what we are worth. Embrace their love and support.

We all get rejected, it is alright to be disappointed but don’t make your life miserable because of some other person’s opinion.
Stay amazing.

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